Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts

Friday, September 4, 2020

Life During a Pandemic

I learnt what a pandemic means only recently. We are six months into the Covid-19 pandemic, and things are only getting nastier every day. We have moved from this stage of intense fear, to intense drudgery and frustration, and now slowly accepting life as it is, and learning to live life a whole new way.

I never had illusions that this pandemic would end anytime before a year at the earliest, even when it started. That did not make it easier. The first few weeks, while filled with dread about the disease, did not dampen the spirits too much. I was working harder than I ever had..sweeping, mopping, dishes, BABY SITTING  a toddler who was just learning to assert her independence and opinions on everything, teaching, research, and then feeding all night. After a few weeks, this drudgery turned into a disease of the mind...there was no weekend, no break, no vacation in sight, no going to the beach, no watching a movie...heck, we are afraid even of the grocery stores! What is this fear..and what is this life? But, I knew deep down that nature is trying to heal, and teach us humans a lesson!

We have fallen irreversibly into an abyss of materialistic and unsustainable lifestyle. The covid has taught us that it is in-fact possible to stay home and not venture out, unless necessary (thereby reducing pollution, and frivolous expenses like shopping, and dining). It has been a lesson in minimalist living, and things that were an indispensable part of life six months ago are actually not at all essential. I have learnt to value people and, value their contribution in making my life simpler, whether it is the iron man, or the house maid. I like that people finally are forced to undertake small weddings, and avoid crowding sacred temples, which have become outward displays of extravagance and piety.

I have started learning to accept that we have to face life in the right spirit. While we cannot throw caution to the winds, one cannot live life by hiding indefinitely or avoiding the inevitable...what will be will be. It terrifies me that our child's caretaker is about to come back next week to us amidst a worsening pandemic, but it appears that we only have ourselves to blame. We have made choices in our lives that we have to live with, and face their consequences.

Is the pandemic about to take over my life, or am I going to be successful in learning to live with whatever blows the virus is about to throw on me? I pray that we get away easy. Will I be so lucky?

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Time to Stand and Stare

I was trying to work in my office this evening when I decided to take a walk in the campus. I tried to clear all the million thoughts in my head, and focus only on the trees, grass, and flowers. I was caressing the flowers as I walked by them, and feeling the dew on the leaves as I walked by. The experience was immensely uplifting and relaxing, to say the least, and I have decided to do this more often.While walking I was reminded of this poem by William Henry Davies (obviously I was not completely free of thoughts !)..

What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

No time to stand beneath the boughs
And stare as long as sheep or cows.

No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass.

No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night.

No time to turn at Beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance.

No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began.

A poor life this is if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare. 

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

These are a few of My Favorite Things

The smell of summer’s first rain
The waft of wind across jasmine plants
The sound of a gushing waterfall
The dew of a mountainside
The stars in a desert sky
These are a few of my favorite things


Friday, December 28, 2012

Battle with Winter


The leaves are gone
The limbs are creaking
The trees are forlorn
Winter is speaking

The colors are missing
The sky is misty
The cold is menacing
Winter is feisty

Life’s spirit is all around
The weather’s gloom despite
Joy and laughter abound
Winter is only inside

Spring is around the corner
Bringing change not hope
Dreams make the days warmer
Winter has yet another stoke

The tougher trees will bloom
Nature is designed to revive
The Sun will defeat the gloom
Or will Winter again survive?

Monday, October 1, 2012

HA- I am not Alone in my Insanity

Some people who read my precious article Will India Be Great Again? have found my ideas too archaic/ radical, or too negative and condescending in the context of India now largely being built on imitations. Today, I stumbled upon this article by Koenrad Elst, and it gave me goosebumps to read a whole exposition on what I had merely stated in four lines. Well, if I am wrong, atleast I am in intellectual and scholarly company.
The notable difference though is that he has specifically made his criticisms against Hindus  while I wrote a generalized "we". However, in the context of my article it is the same. In the glorious era that I talked about, we were almost a completely Hindu nation, and still populate 80% of this country.

Please do read it, and please give it consideration, before rejecting it out rightly..

Sunday, September 30, 2012

Will India be Great Again?

Will India ever regain her past glory is a question lot of Indians ask longingly? What have we done though to regain her greatness? Why were we great a few thousand years ago? When and where did this degeneration start? In that age when we were truly great; morally, intellectually spiritually there were few counterparts. This is not a statement made out of my blind patriotism; history, art, architecture and immense volumes of literature are testimony to this fact. I consider it very significant that all of it was native to the land, her people and reflected her culture, and ideas. The essence was of contentment, of pride in our own beliefs, and ideas. We never shirked away from expressing who we were, be it in art at Khajuraho, or harsh vedic rites. No matter how distasteful or pointless some of it may seem today to the new age.

Can we say the same for ourselves today? We have foregone everything inherent to our innermost natures, indeed we are actually ashamed of it. We have tried to imitate the west in everything that we do. Our architecture is not original, our literature follows plot patterns from the west, our movies are cheap imitations of other tinsel-towns across the globe, and our own traditional clothes are as novel to us as they are to foreigners. Even Tagore and Satyajit Ray are artists from history's back pages, to be read about and admired, but not to be emulated. This is the glorious new Shining India, engaged in a complete transformation based on imitations. Imitations of countries that have about a 100 years of history to testify their greatness. Greatness only visible through economic splendor, no hallmarks of contentment.

If we are successful in our endeavor, we will be great in that sense too. But, we will never be as great, because we will still be just that...an imitation, even if a good one. But to answer the first question that was posed, no, we will never be great again if we continue on this route. Because, I do not believe we will be successful in our endeavor of imitation. No matter how hard we try and pretend that our way of life is repulsive, and that there is need for complete upheaval, we have not been able to put our hearts and souls into it. The society still reeks of unforgotten past,  some grudging pride, and some meaningless devotion to other lingering attributes. We have to fully let go to manufacture a good imitation.

Or we can let go of this charade, acknowledge our strengths, weaknesses, all of them, and start afresh building a new civilization that is original and realistic. I think in that path, there is a hope for greatness.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Abyss of Human Virtues?

"The more I see of the world, the more am I dissatisfied with it; and every day confirms my belief of the inconsistency of all human characters, and of the little dependence that can be placed on the appearance of merit or sense."- Jane Austen in Pride and Prejudice
This line struck a chord in me while I was re-reading Pride and Prejudice this week, it may be because I have been increasingly mystified by inconsistencies of human behavior.
Why are we so fickle minded to let our opinions change based on partial understanding of circumstances? Why cannot people appreciate the good in someone? Should it really  not  be easy to appreciate and praise somebody than criticize? Does not criticism require a more thorough understanding of the other person's situation in life, and at least some proof of having carried one's own self in better fashion?
Even where there is genuine criticism,  why are people so reluctant to even consider the possibility of merit?
Why get offended at everything?
Why are people's memories and gratification so poor that only people with artifice can consciously make it possible to remain universally popular?
Why is it necessary to view everything in this world starting from a friend's unintentional misbehavior to a world cricket champion's good performance with the same cynical eye?
Why have we become so bad that we have lost trust in the goodness of beings?
Why is it so hard to accept people and incidents at face value?
Why are people obsessed with  pleasing, and gaining approval from even those people who don't matter?
Why are we sunk so low to attach a material measure to every trait of human behavior?

Can we forget this and simply enjoy  the pure joy and innocence it all could be, if only we would let it be.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Curing Only the Symptoms

The world has been spiraling in one long downward roller coaster ride ever since the industrial revolution. Perhaps  there have been a few breathers where we have coasted along and felt pleased at all the achievements and exhilaration, but I do not believe that the power holders have once looked forward to see where we are headed. I say world here because no country has proved to be an exception.
Undoubtedly, one may argue that it has been progress like progress never been seen before. But all the new technologies and gadgets have come with a price. We have become so consumerist in nature that most people feel that buying and owning new things can truly make them happy. It does, for a while and once the euphoria wears out, we are back for more and then for more and now we have trapped ourselves into believing that all of this is an essential part of life without which we cannot live. We are in a worse state than drug addicts, because we have no one to cure us. The rare ones who transcend are also labeled as the society’s parsimonious outcasts.
It is common crisis of the mid twenty-ists and the mid forty- ists to be unsure of where they are headed, and what would make them really happy. They all end up making a few life style/ career changes which keeps them going for a few years, and to that sporadic nagging voice murmur connivingly that happiness is after all a disciplined state of mind, and nothing more. Have we spotted the trap yet? How many people really examine the purpose of this ride? Why are we really doing the things we are doing? Ask yourself five consecutive “whys” to your answers and see where you stand.  Even while we have become so good at analyzing complicated problems at work and common mishaps, why do most people shy away from collating their own lives? I think it is because people believe there are no real answers. And that could make one feel even more discouraged than when they started. But I believe that the darker path will have a light at the end, while the seemingly lighter path really goes on forever.

And I think it is this inherent human nature that reflects on everything the society does, on everything a terrorist or a common thug does, on every bill passed and every shallow reform. I am not trying to insinuate that we as a human race are incapable of finding permanent solutions, but yes I do think that the ability is only restricted to simple and straightforward issues.  For instance, let us look at the first few news headlines of today. I am going to quote here random picks from today’s news, but you are free to add yesterday’s and tomorrow’s news to the corollary.
1.       US Debt Ceiling and spending cuts to cut costs of ~$2.1T over the next ten years- How did that solve any problem? No Congressman has had the guts to stand in front of the American people and tell them in as many words “Friends, we have been spending way more than we can afford, and unless we change this in every single home, we are completely doomed”.  Unless the problem is openly acknowledged, there is never going to be a long term solution. The reason being that people are so used to this lifestyle and wastage inherent in a capitalist society, that even the notion of examining this could careen the nation.
2.       Cabinet yet again cleared a Rs.1200 Cr bailout for Air India- This could give rise to multiple questions. First, is money Air India’s biggest problem? When people fly over 25 hours round the globe, nobody wants to be stuck in an aircraft with uncouth and rude air hostesses, perennial flight delays, baggage misplacements and dirty toilets! While the government continues to hire inefficient people based on recommendations and reservations instead of merit, there is no hope for the future. Another more pertinent question: Is it the business of the government to run airlines? Has the government in India ever been good at running or managing anything other than individual bank accounts? If Manmohan Singh is really an honest man trapped in a stronghold of corruption, why does he not dare to come forward and testify against every corrupt politician of his acquaintance? Empty statements and thoughtless policies will not take us anywhere forward.
3.       Dhoni laments tired India- ???.  I have idolized Sachin nearly all my life but this man who is supposed to be the master of all preparation has finally fallen in my eyes. He claimed back in April that everything he has ever done was all towards that moment- the moment where India would hold the world cup. Sadly, it seems he along with everyone else in the cricket team has lost sight of the goal of excellence. How would any conscientious person prefer to tire themselves playing IPL, the most deplorable form of cricket to make a quick buck, choose to sit out the West Indies tour and play test matches in England against a top English team with no preparation what so ever?  West Indies might play a vapid bunch of 11 people, and yet playing them on Caribbean grounds would have been preparation at the very least. Zaheer’s hamstring injury and Harbhajan’s abdominal tear were no accidents.  Why again, are they all playing cricket for the country? Personal pride? Money? If they asked themselves this question, they might hope to realize that national pride is not even among the answer choices.
 “Too much Cricket/too much terror/ too much competition” are symptoms of the real problems, and those need to be addressed, but they are not the causes.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

The Tender Roots of a Bookful Life

Life has been too busy for a good book, or a blog or for anything  that matters truly in life..yet I opened up a news site this morning to see what experts had to say about Australia's thumping triumph over New Zealand...and I never even found that out. A side headline acknowledging the demise of "Uncle" Pai stirred memories within me so deep that I had even forgotten they existed.
I did not read the contents of a single news article, for I knew they would all have thrown vain handfuls of words eulogizing his contribution to Indian comics and yati yati yata. My earliest memories of any book belong not to any alphabet books, but to the Amar Chithra Kathas. I was barely four when my mother used to sit by me and read with me the tales of Ghatotkacha, Prahlad, the conquests of Durga and of Krishna, the enlightenment of Sidhartha and even the wondrous devotion of Ravana. I would join the words, and my mother would bring meaning to them transporting a whole new world to me...a world of imagination, of wisdom, and a thirst for knowledge. Not only did these books teach me to love to read, but also instilled in me a deep love for mythology, and a pride in our age old wisdom.
The days of Enid Blyton, Hardy Boys, Nancy Drew, Narayan and Wodehouse found their spaces as time went by, but those afternoon stories were buried deep  underneath. I had the memorable opportunity of standing 2 feet from this man who had made my childhood so meaningful when he was in Hyderabad conducting a quiz about 13 years ago. I was in the audience giving answers to obscure questions from Indian mythology. I remember the excitement and the disappointment of not having qualified myself. 
Admittedly, I was never an ardent reader of tinkle, even as a young girl the book seemed always overpriced for its content. A few Suppandi and Shikhari Shambu tales were fun but not particularly life changing. Alas, my brother and I owned around 100 such Amar Chithra Kathas thanks to my father, which are no longer even published. He took special care to bind these treasures into three volumes until I watched without protesting as my brother loaned them to people I knew were not careful by nature. I never saw those books again and the thought of these books being given away for their weight in paper still manages to cause an ache in my heart.




Friday, November 12, 2010

Break the Fetter

Round and round
spiralling in a box
gravity bound
In the dark of nox

She tries to fly
with might need she try?
Nay, for she is her gravity
Her night,imprisoned by infidelity


Farther she searches , farther
Until she can see no more
Oh, why now demur?
Only the mirror shows her foe

An impetus to grow
A spark to ignite
A brake to her tow
Her friend,the fear inspite

Her only prisoner
Her only saviour
Are both one another
Save the mind before she wither